I just put up
a post at The City Farmgirl Blog about families and family ties. With Thanksgiving around the corner, a time most of us spend with family, I think it's a good time to consider how we can improve our own. What can I, as an individual, do to make my family better?
What do you think is the secret to a close-knit, healthy family? What kinds of things can parents do to nurture that? What about the children? What can they do?
As I mentioned in that post, I had the opportunity to visit with a very special family last week. As I witnessed the dynamics, I was inspired. I later asked the father what they, the parents, had done--what their secret was--to raising such a nice bunch of kids who are now parents themselves. Kids who seemed to genuinely like and respect each other, their parents, and grandparents. Kids who stuck close. It warmed my heart.
The father's answer to my question about how he and his wife had done so well?
"A lot of prayer."
That happened at my farm in the country.
Where I live full-time, I'm used to seeing disjointed families. Daughters walking beside mothers, the daughter texting, the mom on the phone, and b
oth dressed provocatively. I notice that many fathers are not present, either living elsewhere because of divorce, or busy with work or golf. Kids too. Children are over-busy, with activity after activity after activity. Parents are over-tired. Children are tired. And everyone is stressed and distant with each other.
And selfish. That's the other thing I've come to realize, we are all so selfish and self-absorbed these days. And, as I mention all the time, another result of this trend is that adult children are not taking care of their aging parents.
It looks to me like families are falling apart around here. What's a parent to do?
What do you think the secret is?
Is there one? Or is it just one big crapshoot?